STORIES
THE SENSITIVITY OF MEN
One guy had three girlfriends. Well, this guy could not decide which of the three married. So he decided to entrust to each of them 10 million and see how each would spend the first soldi.La spent the money to improve their appearance: new clothes, trendy hairstyles, manicures, pedicures. In the end the guy said: "I spent the money to get me better because I love you very much" The second signed him up for a golf club, buying a DVD player, a television and mega stereo, then said: "I bought you all these things because I love you very much. "The third invested the money in the right title, doubled the capital, him back 10 million and reinvest the rest in his name. Finally he said: "I invested the money that thinking about our future because I love you very much" The man thought to how long each had used the money. She finally decided: She married the one that had the biggest tits!
WC
A British family, a pleasure trip, he visited a nice little house owned by a Protestant pastor, who seemed to her particularly suited for the upcoming holiday season. Back home, he remembered he had not seen the toilets and thus addressed the minister the following letter: - Dear Mr Shepherd, we are family a few days ago that he has signed a lease for the cottage in the country. But we have not seen the toilet. Please kindly enlighten us on this. Best saluti.Ricevuta the letter the pastor misunderstood sull'abbreviazione WC, and believing that it was an Anglican chapel called Welles Changole, replied as follows: - Dear Sir, I appreciate your request and I am pleased to inform you that the place to covered is 12 km from the lodge, which is very inconvenient, especially for people used to go there frequently. People used to stay very much for the feature, it is good that you bring to eat, so he can stay on site throughout the day. The site can be reached on foot, by bicycle or car. It 'best to go early, stay out and not disturb others. In the room there is room for 30 people seated and 100 standing. Children and adults sit close to the all singing in chorus. Upon arrival will receive a leaflet, and those arriving late, may use the worksheet in the next. The film is to be reused for subsequent time, for at least a month. There are amps that sounds can be heard outside. All that is collected is given to the poor. There are specialist photographers who take pictures in many different positions, so that everyone can see these people act so human. Yours sincerely.
THE MEANING OF LIFE
There was once a beautiful man, very healthy and wealthy. He had billions and billions of capital. Nevertheless he was not happy because he did not know the meaning of life. It was his obsession. He had read many books, encyclopedias, asked everywhere but no one had ever managed to give a real answer soddisfacente.Ad one point meets a man who tells him: "Look, I can not answer, but there is a hermit in Tibet know the meaning of life. "" Where can I find it?. "Then the man gave the necessary explanations to our man. He then took the plane and went to Tibet. He climbed the mountain on foot and after walking for days he finally found the hermit. He introduced himself, he named dell'omino hermit and asked what was the meaning of life. "I'll show you the meaning of life. Come with me." They walked for three days and three nights, and arrived in front of a beautiful river . It was truly a wonder of nature. Then the hermit, with air in triumph said: "You see that river? AND 'THIS IS THE MEANING OF LIFE." "But you say!! I spent a lot of money to come to you. I climbed on foot mountains and mountains, I slept on the floor, do not eat for many days and you tell me the meaning of life is just a small river ?!?!". Then the hermit, with a look of astonishment and perplexity says: "Hmmm ... You say you could not?"
THE PERFECT WOMAN, THE MAN AND PERFECT CHRISTMAS
There was once a perfect man and a woman who is perfect incontrarono.Dopo have made a perfect short, it was their union sposarono.La perfetta.Una eve Christmas night, the perfect couple was traveling on board a perfect car along a deserted road when they saw a man in trouble on board stopped to give the perfect strada.Essendo soccorso.La person in difficulty was Santa Claus with a bag full regali.Non of thousands of children wanting to be disappointed by this Christmas Eve, the perfect couple made up their car on Santa Claus and the gifts and accompanied him to distribuirli.Sfortunatamente, due to bad weather, The three had a incidente.Solo one of the three sopravvisse.Chi? (see solution below) continue to scendereLa perfect woman survived! It is the only person in this story that there veramente.Tutti know that the perfect man and Santa does not esistono.Le women should stop reading this story for them is punto.La finita.Gli continuare.continuate men can get to (only men, I say!) So, if the perfect man and no Santa Claus There are ... driving force for the woman. This explains the incident. A little 'further down ... On the other hand, if you are a woman and you are reading at this point, we are simply demonstrating another truth: She never listens to what they say ! END
male solidarity
A wife comes home at 6 am, with matted hair and the guilty look of someone who has spent a night of love clandestine. The husband asked for an explanation of where it was and she replied: "A house of a friend, we talked a lot, then I collapsed and slept with her" Her husband, suspicious, call the 10 best friends to find out if his wife has stayed there '. No confirmation cosa.Sempre the more pissed off her husband decided to give tit for tat and after a few days back home at 6 am, his shirt rumpled and roguish smile of someone who has spent a night of love clandestine. His wife asked for an explanation of where has been and he says: "A house of a friend, we talked at length, then I collapsed and slept by him," Then his wife, suspicious, call to her husband's 10 best friends to find out if he stayed there '. Result: in 7 say they slept 'through the night and say that 3 is still asleep and do not want to wake ...
MEN & WOMEN
THE HEART OF A WOMAN AND 'HOW THE CIRCUS:
There is always room for more than a buffoon ...
WHAT TO GIVE TO A MAN WHO THINKS YOU HAVE EVERYTHING? A woman
to explain how it works!
WHY 'THE BLACK WIDOWS KILL THE MALE after mating? For
not hear snoring.
WHAT 'THE MAN MOST' INTERESTING IN ITALY? The
turistaPERCHE 'God created man?
Because vibrators do not cut the grass.
WHAT ARE COMMON IN THE WATER AND ANNIVERSARIES?
That men do not ever guessed! WHY
'ONLY 10% OF MEN MUST BE IN HEAVEN?
Because if we would all go to hell!
WHAT 'THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN MEN AND PIGS?
Pigs do not become men when they drink
WHAT 'THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A MAN AND A parrot?
you can teach a parrot to speak so.
WHAT 'SUCCESS TO THE WOMAN WHO' Can you understand men?
E 'died laughing and had no time to tell anyone. WHY
'men have a clear conscience?
Why not use it ever.
What happens to a man when he swallowed a fly live?
You end up with more active neurons in the brain that the stomach! WHY
'GOD CREATED MAN FIRST AND THEN THE WOMAN?
Because the experiments are the first with animals and then humans!
WHY 'TO MEN LIKE SMART WOMEN?
Because opposites attract!
WHAT 'THE BOOK MOST' THIN THE WORLD?
"Everything men know about women"
WHAT 'THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN MEN AND THE FRUIT?
fruit sooner or later ages. WHY
'batteries are better than men?
Because the batteries at least a positive side to have it.
resemble WHAT MEN AND SNAILS? Both
dragging, have horns and they believe that their home is!
WHY A MAN 'CAN NOT' HAVE A GOOD CHARACTER AND BE SMART AT THE SAME TIME?
Why else would a woman!
SAID WHAT GOD CREATED AFTER THE MAN?
I can do better.
WHY 'ARE NECESSARY MILLION ONE sperm to fertilize eggs?
Because sperm are male and will never stop to ask for information on the right track.
WHEN A MAN LOSES 90% of his intelligence? When it becomes a widower
And when you lose the remaining 10%?
When the dog dies ...
THE HORSE AND THE PIG
A horse is lying down and no longer wants to know rialzarsi.Il factor desperate, having tried everything, call your veterinarian. Those that arrived on site, visit the animals and tells the foreman, "Cases that are serious, is the only try for a couple of days to give him these pills: if you do not respond will be killed." The pig has heard it all and runs from the horse: "Get up, get up, otherwise throws evil!" But the horse does not react and turn the head of lato.Il second day back and the vet administered the pills again, then telling factor, "Do not react: wait a little 'But I think there is anything to be done. "The pig has heard it all and still runs the horse:" You really must react, watch that otherwise have trouble !!!". But the horse niente.Il third day the veterinarian verifies the absence of progress and turned to the steward, "Give me the gun: it's time to kill that poor animal." The pig runs from desperate horse: "You have to react, is the last chance, please, are going to kill you!" The horse then it jumps up and starts to run, jump over obstacles and to mention walking danza.Il factor is happy and addressed to the vet tells him: "Thank you! She is a wonderful doctor, he did a miracle! We simply must do a big party: up, soon, kill the pig! "
STORE IN NEW YORK
in New York has just opened a new shop where women can choose and buy a husband. Upon the instructions are on display about how the store: 1) You can visit the store ONLY VOLTA.2) There are 6 floors and features the best men salendo.3) You can choose any man to a plane or get on the floor superiore.4) can not be return to top inferiore.Una woman decides to visit the store to find husbands compagno.Al first floor the sign on the door says: "These men have jobs." The woman decides to go to the second floor successivo.Al the sign reads: "These men have jobs and love kids." The woman decides to go to the successivo.Al third floor sign reads: "These men have jobs, love kids and are extremely beautiful.". "Wow" - thinks the woman, but feels compelled to keep ancora.Al fourth floor the sign reads: "These men have jobs, love kids, are beautiful to die and help do chores." - Incredible! - Exclaimed the woman - I can hardly resist! But, having said that, even salt. On the fifth floor the sign reads: "These men Have Jobs, Love Kids, are Drop Dead Gorgeous, help with the housework and are very romantic." The woman is tempted to stay and pick one, but decided to go last piano.Il sign on the sixth floor, "You are No. visitor 31,456,012 to this floor, there are no men here, this plan only exists to show that it is impossible to please a woman. Thank you for choosing our store! "
hahaha! ke fun! ke I hope you liked them! hello ^ _ ^
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